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doreen and her mom
Asked by: lover454
from FRESH MEADOWS, NY
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OK yesterday Doreen’s mom (in her 80’s) and Doreen (in her 50’s) went to see “Mama Mia” which was wonderful. Any way as the movie started all of a sudden Doreen got very hot and extremely dizzy. (A few years ago Doreen got dizzy and she made the mistake of going to a few doctors, each one misdiagnosed why she was dizzy and with the medication each doctor gave Doreen, Doreen kept getting worse until she went to one doctor who cured Doreen).
Mom: “What is wrong”
Doreen: “I feel dizzy”
The dizziness stopped but Doreen was nervous a little bit throughout the movie. When the movie ended:
Mom: “Just wait until we get into the car I want to talk to you”
Doreen: “Well if we are going to have a fight I don’t want to hear it”
Mom: “Then take the bus”
But Doreen got into the car
Mom: “You have to stop drinking coffee”
Doreen: “I know I am going to stop”
(And Doreen thought that would be the end of the conversation - wrong)
Mom: “I know you drink coffee for weight loss. You don’t need to lose any more weight”
Doreen: “But I was always skinny”
Mom: “Yes but now you are even skinnier”
This got Doreen mad and they had some fight. When they came home her mom said nasty things to Doreen and Doreen said nasty things back to her mom.
Mom: “You need to gain weight”
Doreen: “No I don’t”
Mom: “It isn’t just the coffee but the way you eat”
Doreen: “I like salads“
Mom: “But when you order a salad they give you mostly lettuce and six strips of chicken you leave over two.”
When Doreen went on the computer she found out the reason she was getting dizzy and it was because of the herb she is taking but Doreen cannot tell her mom that because her mom is very opinionated.
THEN TODAY;
Doreen: “Mom do you want to know why I got mad yesterday it is because you made it sound like I wasn’t always thin”
Mom: “That is how you hear it”
Then about five minutes later they had a terrible fight because her mom started to rant and rave.
Doreen: “All I wanted was for you to answer that one question”
Mom: “OK yes you were fat before - how’s that” - her mom said this in a tone to get Doreen mad and upset.
My question: How would you interpret both conversations and would do you think Doreen misinterpreted the word “any more“? Would you think “any more” means that Doreen’s mom did not think she was thin in the past. GIVE DETAILS
YOU SEE: Doreen is upset because now she feels that whatever she puts on is not good enough and her clothes are beautiful.
Mom: “What is wrong”
Doreen: “I feel dizzy”
The dizziness stopped but Doreen was nervous a little bit throughout the movie. When the movie ended:
Mom: “Just wait until we get into the car I want to talk to you”
Doreen: “Well if we are going to have a fight I don’t want to hear it”
Mom: “Then take the bus”
But Doreen got into the car
Mom: “You have to stop drinking coffee”
Doreen: “I know I am going to stop”
(And Doreen thought that would be the end of the conversation - wrong)
Mom: “I know you drink coffee for weight loss. You don’t need to lose any more weight”
Doreen: “But I was always skinny”
Mom: “Yes but now you are even skinnier”
This got Doreen mad and they had some fight. When they came home her mom said nasty things to Doreen and Doreen said nasty things back to her mom.
Mom: “You need to gain weight”
Doreen: “No I don’t”
Mom: “It isn’t just the coffee but the way you eat”
Doreen: “I like salads“
Mom: “But when you order a salad they give you mostly lettuce and six strips of chicken you leave over two.”
When Doreen went on the computer she found out the reason she was getting dizzy and it was because of the herb she is taking but Doreen cannot tell her mom that because her mom is very opinionated.
THEN TODAY;
Doreen: “Mom do you want to know why I got mad yesterday it is because you made it sound like I wasn’t always thin”
Mom: “That is how you hear it”
Then about five minutes later they had a terrible fight because her mom started to rant and rave.
Doreen: “All I wanted was for you to answer that one question”
Mom: “OK yes you were fat before - how’s that” - her mom said this in a tone to get Doreen mad and upset.
My question: How would you interpret both conversations and would do you think Doreen misinterpreted the word “any more“? Would you think “any more” means that Doreen’s mom did not think she was thin in the past. GIVE DETAILS
YOU SEE: Doreen is upset because now she feels that whatever she puts on is not good enough and her clothes are beautiful.
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Same problems - different names! Why is this petty arguing taking priority over the relationship between mother and daughter!??? I don't get it! What difference does it make what the mother meant by 'any more'!?? It's not important - just like the clothing issue! Stop trying to analyze words and try building a better relationship! Some day, it will be too late! Then what?
Answer Date: 10:52am 08/04/08











